I photographed my first birth in the year 2003. To say it was a pivotal moment in my work is an understatement. It began as a documentary project about the P family and the year prior to the birth of their second child. A project about birth is a challenge for so many reasons- but primarily because like all things, birth does not happen in a vacuum. This is true about the way we give birth, but is also true with regard to creating work about it. Fortunately, I recognized this truth and began to spend time with the P family—to cultivate the trust and familiarity that would allow them the courage to call me to photograph the birth.
I say this with the knowledge that being photographed is not the most comfortable experience for many people. This applies to many of us who, even in grade school, dreaded being faced with our own forced smile through the cellophane of our school photo packages. As a professional documentary/portrait photographer and artist, I live in the sometimes gray area, where capturing honest images of my subjects while creating a flattering likenesses can be an interesting and challenging feat. I have always hoped to create images that transcend the common dissatisfaction we can all feel with our photographic image by keeping intact that unique beauty a resonance of a singular moment.
The P family was incredibly accepting as I chronicled their simple activities- bathing their toddler, a grocery market trip, eating lunch. I think it would be ignorant to suggest that I could be a completely passive element in these activities. Most of the time I spent not documenting, but being. I settled into 'being in their spaces,' fighting the possibility that I might become a force of self-consciousness.
The birth represented the ultimate challenge technically, emotionally and with respect to my subjects. This first birth I shot humbly with a manual 35mm and no flash whatsoever. This made it easier to be unobtrusive, except for the occasional click, click of my tool. And, of course, there was my actual presence. Luckily the birth happened during the day with some ambient light and so circumstance allowed me to make images that illustrated the quiet dim of the birthing room and the unfolding beauty of that child's first moments of life.
Mrs. P birthed her second son at the Alternative Birthing Center at Women and Infants Hospital. The space lent its self well to birth, with the functionality of the hospital but the comfort of a home-like space. This birth, its intimacy, power and tenderness, set the scene not only for the photographs I took that day, but also formed the foundation for a belief system about birth that has become part of my professional life, artistic process, as well as personal and health decisions.
